100 of the Worst Ideas in History

Reading this e-book is NOT a bad idea at all.

Genre: History, Factoids
Rating: 3 kilos of Frankenfish

A letter to my 24 year old self on my 34th birthday

I know what you've been through but take it easy brother, it's all worth it.

You were never born rich, your family has no influence whatsoever, no social status to bank on but be strong to maintain at your age the values of incorruptibility and trustworthiness. You will face hard decisions especially when a lot of people are involved but follow your heart and your conscience. Both will guide you to a path of righteousness.

Amid limitations and problems, believe that you can rise to the challenge starting on your own effort. When you're at the bottom, there is nothing else to do but to climb but do it one step at the time. Be aware that others are climbing the ladder too so be respectful and be helpful. Even if you choose to live a simple life, know that you still have to work for it. Just don't forget to laugh and learn from others. Treasure your folks and know your place in this part of the world.

Do not be afraid of leaving your comfort zone. Who said that a comfort zone is always static? Nobody. How about trying to see it in a different light? Make it reside in your heart so that you don't need to leave it, you carry it anywhere you go. Just be inspired and keep on dreaming. You have the strength to transform any place to become a piece of heaven. Use it to help your brothers and sisters. Share your blessings and practice humility. Appreciate kindness. Love and forgive but never forget the lessons. Say sorry when you need to. Appreciate somebody who comes along especially if she's the only one who can make you smile.

Knowledge may lead you somewhere, but attitude is everything. Take heed that nice words are nothing if they come from the carnivorous sheep. You will meet a lot of them. If you want to win, play it by God's rules and nothing more. Let them play by their own dirty rules. It's not all about winning, but learning and becoming a better person.

Don't throw away what you have learned. Use them well. You will find soon enough the importance of having a basic background before you take the next steps. You can study on your own but you can also learn from the group so choose your tribe wisely. Sharpen your tools as you wait, and respect the virtue of patience because, it really is a VIRTUE.

Last but not the least, remember about what Master Yoda said to the young Skywalker. It's either you do or you do not. There is no try. You can actually try, but most of the time, it's all about doing it or not doing it. Trying will only lead you to a lot of excuses. Choose to say "I will." It simply means you walk the talk and execute your plans. If the unexpected happens, don't worry there's still another day of possibilities waiting for you.

Seeking wisdom and guidance from Above wont hurt. So good luck!

Looking Back 6: Prehistoric Philippines

Last year as a commemoration of Philippine Independence I enjoyed the Looking Back 1 by Ambeth Ocampo. After finishing today I find this 6th book of the series equally enjoyable and insightful as a closer look into the Philippine history.

So what are the nuggets I learned from this book?

• "History" as an academic term refers to the "written" records and documents, as compared to the term "Prehistory" that refers mostly to the artifacts, and relics predating the advent of the printed words (and symbols/ numbers).

• The idea of a land-centered "territory" usually bounded by water is purely Hispanic and American. Our ancestor's idea of "territory" does not exclude bodies of water (i.e. rivers, lakes) but rather include them and even put them as an integral and central part of the territory because they serve as the main medium of travel. In contrast to "roads," our ancestors highly used "rivers" to transport from one "barangay" to another. Of course, they don't use carriages nor animals in those days yet, but boats.

• The Merlion symbol of Manila's official coat-of-arms predates the Lion symbol branding of Singapore by centuries.

• The Boxer Codex does not just showcase the detailed tattoo art of the Visayan Pintados but also the recurring local superstitions in the period of the Spanish Philippines.

• Our earliest written record discovered so far is not a song nor a poem, but a receipt for payment of debt. It's the Laguna Copperplate Inscription of 900 A.D.

• There are lots of Filipino artifacts scattered in museums around the world but we are thankful at least, they were able to protect them. The Philippine National Museum--the home of local artifacts and documents were destroyed from the Battle of Manila in 1945.

Manunggul Jar

source

Agusan Gold

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Genre: Philippine History
Rating: 4 sturdy lantakas out of 5

The Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared

How catchy and outrageous can a title get?

More than you can imagine. On the surface, you would think that this is just one of those novels with the basic 'around-the-world-in-XX-days' premise or perhaps another adventure and romp through 'space and time.' But this one is an exemption deserving to earn the reader's attention, especially for somebody out there who loves history and travel. This is not just an adventure story of one person--a centenarian with a Masters in Explosives title in his proverbial "resume," but a story of a group--and how they were able to unite themselves like a family when only weeks ago they were perfect strangers to each other, some even wanting to kill another. What the F right?

It's so tempting to compare Allan Emmanuel Karlsson with Forrest Gump. I can see it from book reviews in Amazon, Shelfari, and Goodreads. But I refuse to compare the two even if they have something in common, and that is coming from the simple lifestyle in the suburbs. The two may be fruits, but you can't compare apples to oranges (or to lift a comparison from the book--you can't compare vodka to banana liquor). With or without being aware of it, Forrest Gump have done something for American history. But Allan Karlsson have done lots of things for World History in crazy and funny ways. If you love WWII stories, you will appreciate this book more. Allan Karlsson provided his expertise and antics in World History after meeting an all-star cast of characters like General Franco, J. Robert Oppenheimer, Harry Truman, Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, Soong May-ling, Chiang Kai-shek, Mao Tse-tung, Kim Il Sung, the young Kim Jong Il, Lyndon Johnson, Charles De Gaulle, and Richard Nixon. And to top it all, there's an elephant, and a dog to join the party too.

As a novel I can say it's well-written by a Swedish author with a background in journalism. After Stieg Larsson and Jo Nesbo, the popular Nordic invasion of Western Literature rages on and it is here, surprisingly in the form of a funny story by Jonas Jonasson. It's a welcome and a cool departure too from serious themes of murder and detection by Larsson and Nesbo.

If you're a Filipino, just take it easy on the notoriety of formalin-induced Swedish meatballs made in the Philippines mentioned twice in the novel. Formaldehyde is of course, not country specific and anyone can do it anywhere but at least, it's nothing against the cardboard-filled Siopao buns made in China. Your choice--Bola-bola or Asado?


Genre: Historical Fiction, Adventure & Comedy
Rating: 4.5 bags of Swedish meatballs from the Philippines

When The Elephants Dance by Tess Uriza Holthe

This is my first attempt in joining Read Philippines' Book of the Month for June 2012. I actually voted for this novel, but this book originally published in 2002 has its flaws. I can see that it's not very realistic, nor strictly contextualized in the Philippine setting and this would have explained why most readers of Asian Historical Fiction remained neutral and would prefer the more prominent Ilustrado novel by Syjuco as a recommended text. This book probably needs an editor but it's understandable given the enthusiasm of the author (she tells it like a balikbayan sharing her own adventures from a strange land) in forming a synergy of variable folk and war stories to become a singular novel in the end.

Here are what I notice:

• The title itself. Used by a Filipino patriarch as an analogy of the Second World War to his children, elephants were depicted as the American and Japanese forces while the chickens scampering were pictured as the Filipinos. On the surface it may sound appropriate since elephants are essentially foreign animals to the country just like the Japs and the Americans but the father in the story used an analogy, and I think it's better to use an animal that all children in the war-thorn Manila were familliar like a water buffalo or carabao. There are no elephants in the Philippines, not yet in the zoo during the war thorn era of WWII. I prefer to rephrase what Mang Carlito said in the book like this: "When the buffalos dance, the chickens must be careful." It's much easier (and amusing) to imagine it as a Filipino child.
• Another contextual miscue is the usage of "snow" in a simile. "The evenings in our cordillera village were always deliciously hot, with the scent of the white sampaguita flowers that grew like flakes of snow around our house." The narrator here is a Filipino native in WWII telling a childhood story to Filipino audience, asking them to imagine snow flakes sprouting around the house. The problem is, there's no snow in the Philippines.
• "All Soul's Day, also known as Todos Los Santos, happened on the evening of October 31. Halloween, they call it in the States." What happens on the evening of October 31 is indeed Halloween, and then All Saints Day or Todos Los Santos the following morning of November 1. However, All Souls Day or Araw ng mga Patay, occurs on November 2. 

I dont want to elaborate further on some spelling and historical miscues (like the weird prominence of Boracay in 1940s) nor ponder on the "uncharacteristic" breakdown of a revolutionary hero and the sudden fear of bleeding to death when you already killed a lot and can easily kill more human being. But we all know that a coin has two faces and seeing the brighter side of the novel is still a rewarding and probably redeeming act. Reading the fantastic stories full of traditional values like unity and sense of family inspires me more not to let go of the colorful history of my people's race in Asia.

There is no contention that the author Tess Uriza Holthe was inspired by her father's experience as a young boy in this country during the second World War. You can sense her enthusiasm and pride in retelling the folk tales we are all familiar with as Filipinos, and it's admirable. It was an amalgam of stories within a story, sometimes amusing, sometimes inspiring, and also heartbreaking. It's probably the best description of this novel, as it mirrors the collective Filipino and its struggle for independence and sense of national identity from its Asian, Hispanic, and American experience.

My favorite quote from the book: "I do not hide, Alejandro. Remember this day. Remember how everyone fought together. Keep it in your heart, and never let anyone divide us again. As for me, I will try to build something from what remains. My soul needs time to heal. I go now to see where this new peace shall lead us. Please, tell the others goodbye." 



Genre: Historical Fiction, Folk Tales, WWII, Anti War Literature
Rating: 3.9 kilos of rice 

Looking Back by Ambeth Ocampo

1990 and 2010 Editions

What's better than to celebrate the First Philippine Independence by enjoying a factual book rich in history and trivia? This 92-pager of a thin book is a flash read that will make your day of commemoration as a proud Filipino worthwhile. I highly recommend this to my fellow Filipinos and also to lovers (scholars and dabblers aside) of Asian History.

Some interesting stories here in case you forgot about your brown roots and its colorful past:

• Magellan originally named the Philippines as Archipelago de San Lazaro. Actually, it wasnt Magellan who gave the name Las Islas Filipinas but Ruy Lopez de Villalobos in 1542. 
• The patriarch of a very popular and historic mestizo family (popularly synonymous to the name Makati) was convicted as a German spy in Manila in 1870s by the Spanish friars.
• Bonifacio tried to seek revolutionary aid from Japan, and failed/fooled.
• Prior to the Spanish-American War and the buyout of the Philippines for a sum of 20 Million US dollars; Belgium, Germany, and Japan were also interested in owning the Philippine Archipelago.
• Manuel Quezon hired in secret the national artist Honorata "Atang" de la Rama to serenade and win the heart of Doña Aurora Aragon. 
• Gen. Gregorio "Goyo" Del Pilar can compete with Jose Rizal in regards to women but Heneral Goyo easily wins over Rizal in regards to "papormahan." 
• Gen. Douglas MacArthur's secret Filipina lover is the record holder of first Philippine motion picture on-screen kiss.
• We have our own version of the mysterious Mona Lisa painting by Leonardo Da Vinci---Juan Luna's La Bulaqueña. The identity of the woman in portrait remains a mystery and the current theories, inconclusive. 
• Juan Luna's Portrait of Paz Pardo de Tavera is not just popular due to its paradoxical catholic eroticism but also because it survived the burnings and damages throughout history and most especially the popular curse legend that it carries today. 
• The man appointed by Aguinaldo to work for American recognition of Philippine independence-- Felipe Agoncillo ditched his lover for another on the day of his marriage. The marriage was cancelled after the groom changed his mind and stuck on his bed pondering the future while still dressed for the occassion. This man, who will become the father of Marcela Agoncillo will also become the first Filipino diplomat, and a man worthy of 1000+ TNL points. Sinong lolo mo? lol

There are more stories in this surprisingly short book that will lead to a chuckle or a lighthearted gab within a group. I can only imagine how cool it was if you had Manuel Quezon as your grandfather to learn a proven "diskarte" move or two. The first book in a series originally published in 1990 and republished and re-edited in 2010, it's cool to enjoy history with this as much as knowing that it's good to be free reading any book these days.

La Bulaqeña by Juan Luna ca.1895

image source

Category: History, Trivia
Rating: 4.5 freshly baked monays with quesong puti fillings